Problems for the Adult – Adult Child of Divorce

A growing piece of the ACD pie includes those who experience the divorce of their parents after they are adults. Too many think that now that the kids are away at school or married they wont be affected by their divorce. In reality, additional issues are created for their adult children. Kasey Edwards describes the dilemma. “The first battle is over loyalty. You must pick a side. The second battlefront adult children are dragged into is not necessarily as dramatic, but just as putrid: the role of confidante.” *

Parents Divorcing When We’re Grown can be Harder

Brooke Lea Foster goes into more detail  on the second battlefront. “Parents openly burden adult children with their problems, treating us like friends.  On their own for the  first time in 20 years or more, parents need guidance and support. But If dad cheats or mama takes off with dad’s savings, adult children are the first to know.  Parents forget that just because we’re in our twenties doesn’t mean we feel any less like their son or daughter.” **

A Great Look at the Issue

Brookes’ book, The Way They Were” is the only book I’ve read that deals exclusively with the issues adults face when their parents divorce. Her transparency makes for an insightful and  helpful look at an issue within an issue that affects millions. It is not a Christian book and includes an occasional word or phrase that wouldn’t be included in one, but it does a great job of tackling this surprisingly tough problem.

* Kasey Edwards, “Adult Children of Divorcé, “Huffington Post: http://www.huffingtonpost.com. (March 3, 2013) ** Brooke Lea Foster, The Way They Were,(New York: Three Rivers Press, 2006), 5